Comic Con - Thursday, Day 1: Attack of the Panels

Today was Thursday. Much more fun. True to last year's form, I swung from hating and fearing Preview Night, to quietly enjoying the more sedate Thursday.

Okay, not really sedate. That's hardly the right word. But I spent most of my time in panels today, which helped a lot.

I'm also an idiot and I left my sim card at the hotel, which means I failed to take any photos of anything except the daily loot. Here it is, the one lone photo from today:


Yeah, I cornered the market on Scott Pilgrim stuff.

If I'd remembered to take a sim card, I would have taken photos of all the cool stuff on the con floor. Like the full-size replica Owlship from Watchmen, or the huge Castle Greyskull, or DC's enormous, ever-crowded booth.

I'd have taken shots of the costumed folk (bless 'em, they really make the con special); the Boba Fetts, Batman villains, stormtroopers, anime ones that
I don't get, and knights in full plate armour beating the crap out of each other up on the mezzanine level.

I'd definitely have snapped a few blurry pics from the 4 panels we saw today -- 2 comics-related and 2 TV-related, which seems a good ratio. The first comics panel was Stan Lee and Grant Morrison. Stan Lee is exactly how you'd imagine him to be. Exactly. Morrison was polite and reserved, and seemed happy to concede the floor to Stan's constant showboating.

The next comics panel was a dream line-up: Robert Kirkman, Colleen Doran, Matt Fraction (Fraction!), John Cassaday, Jim Lee, Mike Mignola and Morrison again. They chatted amongst themselves. It was obviously very interesting, as they're all living legends. But it could have used more Fraction. The questions from the audience were pretty lame, but that seems to be the norm.

The TV panels we saw were for True Blood (Alan Ball doing an HBO vampire series. Yeah, that was my reaction, too.) and Dexter (the best show about a lovable serial killer ever). True Blood actually looks pretty good. HBO must have spent a fortune on advertising; the show's banners are plastered all over the con. Plus, they gave us all free bags, shirts, comics and a copy of the book the show is based on! The atmosphere in the Dexter panel was electric. But hey, if anyone deserves to be drooled over by adoring fans, it's Julie Benz and Michael C. Hall.

The food in the con is fucking terrible and costs a fortune. I know the American peso is weak, but $8 for a sandwich?

I'm no longer convinced our pro passes allow us to skip the queues. I swear to God I saw people doing it last year, but maybe it only applies to certain rooms. All I can say is, I hope it gets us into Joss' panel tomorrow.

I saw Comic Book Tattoo, the new Image anthology based on Tori Amos songs, and it is gorgeous. My Under the Gun collaborator, that young rogue Josh Hechinger, has a story in there, you know. The book is as big as a house and I'd never get it home, but I'm still foolishly contemplating buying a copy.

The business side of things is not going so fantastically. Several (okay, most) of the people I was supposed to meet are not actually at the con this year. We won't actually be hanging out at Eric's booth, unfortunately, but we'll still be handing out the CAGES buttons somewhere, sometime. Er, watch this space.

I'm surely forgetting a ton of stuff, but the hour grows late, and Friday looms near.

Comic Con - Wednesday Preview Night: The Show That Ate San Diego

Holy shit, man. Holy shit.

Comic Con International is here again, and I'm here with it. This time around I've got a professional badge, which is sort of like a license to kill, except not at all. It's more that I get in for free and can skip the long lines. I'm now the kind of person last year's me would have hated.

I'm going to go out on a (extremely sturdy) limb here and say that this year's attendance is enormously bigger than the last. I certainly don't remember this many people at Preview Night, and there were a shit-ton of people at Preview Night last year.

I hear whispered stories that Wednesday night used to be a quiet, genteel affair, attended only by the bored and completists. This year it was a hellish mosh pit of FREE FREE FREE showbags and posters and screaming, pushing people trying to grab 5 of everything.

There was a line 100 people deep for postcards and buttons at the DC booth. Just to pick them up. Postcards and buttons.

I almost died at the Warner Brothers booth while securing a bag with a picture of Wonder Woman on it. There was nothing in the bags, they're just bags, but people were crushing each other to get to them. The poor WB people were yelling for the crowd to remain calm. It was like the goddamn Fall of Berlin in there.

It made me a little bit sick for a little while. Then I remembered that Preview Night had shocked me last year, and I went on to have a really good show. And hey, if Comic Con's bloodthirsty consumerism doesn't make you throw up in your mouth a little, at least once, then you ain't human.

Besides, I bought my first comic book of the show -- the new volume of Elephantmen, signed by Richard Starkings! -- and I can't wait to read it. Comics are great. Comic Con is great. So long as I get to skip all the lines.

Now for the return of a now-annual tradition: the photographing of the daily swag. Here's Wednesday's haul:


Why yes, that Battlestar bag is awesome. Cool cover for this year's Event Guide, too.

And now, a picture of my satchel bag, new buttons on the right. I got a DC Nation, an Elephantmen, and a... Hang on. What's that?! Could it be?


It is. That, my friends, is a CAGES button. Limited run of 50. If you want one of your own, you'll have to bump into us at the con and ask us. Or we may be hanging out Friday or Saturday with the wonderful Eric Knisley over in the Small Press area.

Preview Night is over. On with the show!

First, A Word From Your Host

It's been a long time since I weblogged something on these intertubes. The thing is, there've been many things in the last 2 months that I've wanted to talk about on here, but the twin devils of work and after-work idleness got in my way.

Now I'm in San Diego promoting our book, and I therefore have something half-decent to blog about, and all these other happenings need to be neatly summed up in a few sentences. Like so:

- We passed the 52nd week of Elephant Words (link to Elephant Words in the sidebar over there; I'd fetch it for you, but the touchpad on this EeePC is a bitch to use). That means I've written a short (sometimes incredibly short) story every week for the past year. I never knew I could do that. My co-conspirators at EW are some of the nicest people and finest writers a guy could hope to know. I plan to continue with it.

- Speaking of anniversaries, I'm at San Diego Comic Con again, and do you know what that means? Well, considering I started this blog in order to document last year's con, I'm pretty sure that means this blog is one year old. Huzzah!

- Our book is out. Well, no, that's a lie. Our comic CAGES is being properly printed in September. But I am currently in possession of several incomplete proof copies, and they're really real books. They've got glossy covers and nice binding, and they have our names on the front. It feels warm and fuzzy.

- Holy expletive there are a lot of good shows on TV right now. Battlestar Galactica, Big Love, Dexter, Mad Men and Flight of the Conchords have joined forces to overwhelm me with awesomeness. Are we living in a Golden Age of television? When did this Renaissance happen?

- Dr Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog was bloody fantastic, wasn't it? I can't wait for the panel at San Diego. (It's funny; I've enjoyed watching the stunned/appalled reaction from certain corners of the internet in re: Act 3. It's a Joss show, people -- that means guaranteed pain. At this point, I'd be surprised if he didn't rip our hearts out and show them to us.)

- D&D 4th Edition is amazing. Yeah, yeah, it's culturally lame, and playing it sorta makes me feel like I'm back in high school. But I think it might be one of the best RPGs ever written, or at least the best since Exalted. And at this point, I can't afford to be choosy about culture -- I'll take any book, game or show that makes me feel that sense of wonder and awe again.

Right. Next up San Diego Comic Con International!

CAGES Is Almost Upon Us

My first book CAGES is at the printers right now. Like, as we speak. This is fairly exciting.

It also means that I'm going to be very busy for the foreseeable future. The marketing blitzkrieg is already underway -- the official website's getting redesigned (ditto the Insomnia Publications site), press releases are being put out, and I'm sending digital review copies to those worthy reviewers and bloggers who want to write about it.

So... are you a comic book reviewer or blogger? Would you like a review copy of the book? Well, why didn't you say so? Just shoot me an email at the usual place, and I'll be happy to send you a copy.

For those of you going to the Bristol International Comics Expo in a few weeks, you'll even have a chance to pick up a special advance copy of the book. Just sidle over to the Insomnia Publications table and look for a Scottish bloke called Crawford. Tell him, in these exact words, "G'day from Xander". He'll know what to do.

Thirdly (!), some more exciting news about CAGES: Australian comics superstar Ben Templesmith (30 Days of Night, Fell) will be providing us with a foreword for the book. He is a scholar and a gentleman.

And last but not least, I can announce that Insomnia will be attending San Diego Comic Con again this year. Okay, actually it's just me and Mel. But we'll have a table, and banners, and lovely comics to sell. Have you booked your accommodation yet?

Okay, I lied, there's one more thing: My writing partner and all-around great guy Josh Hechinger just did an excellent interview for Sequential Tart. I swear, I would have pointed you to this even if he hadn't given me a shout-out in the interview.

Conventional Thinking

Being a collection of thoughts on or inspired by San Diego Comic Con...

• Man, Blackberries are popular over here. I must have seen 50 of the bloody things in just a few days. Same with Nintendo DSes. Not so much with the iPhones, but the ones I saw sure looked cool.

• What the hell are they going to do about the crowds next year? Word has it that the Con is locked into the SD Convention Center for at least another 5 years, so this should be interesting.

• After 5 days of teaser trailers, celebrities, Star Wars, Star Trek, costumes, toys, TV, gaming and collectibles, I'm trying to imagine what an actual comic book convention would be like. You know -- one of the ones devoted solely to, um, comic books.

• When you first crack open the official programme, you inevitably start circling panels and workshops and spotlight sessions all over the place. But when you actually get there, you find it's extremely taxing to attend more then 3 of these a day.

• Want to read Joss' new comic? It's free right here.
  

• Really, the city of San Diego is wonderfully supportive of Comic Con. Its poor citizens didn't seem to mind too much that their downtown was cordoned off, their roads detoured, their trains commandeered and their historic quarter defiled by the presence of a billion nerds. The SDPD did an excellent and thankless job keeping the crowds from spilling onto roads and train tracks. But Jesus, I'm surprised they all didn't just leave town for a week.

• Americans are fascinated by British people, aren't they? Watching Neil Gaiman and Warren Ellis speak is to watch a crowd in thrall. And then you look at the massive output of comic books set in or related to Britain (especially from Vertigo), and the success of Doctor Who, etc., and you go 'Hmm'. My accent was frequently mistaken for British, and they always looked so damned disappointed when I corrected them.

• I'd like to give mad props and shout-outs to the Godly Men of Small Press Table K-15: The Xeric-winning Eric Knisley, the Eisner-nominated Paul Friedrich, and all-around nice guy and cephalopod enthusiast Kevin Dixon.

• More shout-outs to the excellent folks in charge of Age of Insects. I hope they did extremely well from the con, after the incredible effort they put in.

• I've learned a hell of a lot in the last few days. I've learned what it takes to make your book stand out from the crowd; I've learned about the importance of cultivating a writing persona; the nature of fans and fandom; the various attitudes and strategies taken by different companies in the comics world; the art of meeting people and the power of face-time. There's a whole mess of thoughts just swirling around in my head that I hope to make sense of over the next few days.
  

• I've also learned the importance of clothing. There's certainly an advantage to be had from wearing a classy shirt, as opposed to a fan-shirt, when you're trying to act all professional. Not that the latter doesn't have its benefits. For example, as I boarded the train back to LA, I was having a lot of trouble lifting my ludicrously-heavy luggage over my shoulders, let alone up into the luggage rack. Then I heard a voice from the seat behind me: "Need a hand with that... fellow Browncoat?". The man had spotted the brand-new Firefly shirt I was wearing. We are legion.

• I heard some crazy things regarding Hollywood's presence at the con. Rumor was that most major studios sent 5 to 8 scouts this year. Word at the Engine drinks was that the Avatar booth got at least 5 option queries a day -- producers would walk up to the comic books, point at them and go, "Is this optioned? How much?". Rantz Hoseley told me about the producer who tried to option his promo pamphlet for a book that's not even out yet. Next year, for the CAGES booth, I think we'll have to have big signs made up which read 'Option Available -- Guaranteed Bigger Than Spider-Man'. Or nametags that say 'Ask Me About My Low, Low Creative Integrity!'

• Jesus fucking Christ, Ladronn's Elephantmen books look beautiful in person.

• The highlights of the con? My Big Pitch, and Joss' panel -- plus honorable mentions to Warren's panel and the Engine drinks.

• And finally, there's one thought that haunts me: SD may be the biggest show, but it's only one convention among many. A lot of poor, tired creators and publishers are going to have to do this again at Chicago in 2 weeks, and at various places all year round. Madness.
  

Watch. Now.

ATTENTION -- If you watch any two YouTube clips from Comic Con today, please make it these two...

The Iron Man footage.

Neil Gaiman kisses a man at the Eisners.

Day Four and Oh God It's Over

It's all over, I'm back in Los Angeles, and the world is beginning to slow down just a little.

God, Sunday sucked. Sunday is traditionally Kids' Day, a mild and relaxed affair, but as I've mentioned before, this year saw all the rules and traditions shoved right out the window. Sunday was a perfect storm born from a brutal equation: No good panels scheduled + Retailers offering discounts to get rid of stock + A sold-out day = Mayhem.

The con floor had a desperate edge to it, and the jerks, hagglers, hasslers and pushers were out in full force. Many of the booth-dwellers I spoke to were bleary-eyed and shell-shocked, having celebrated the night before in anticipation of a lazy last day. Ouch.

I did see Grant Morrison in the flesh. I didn't meet him. There are, of course, a million things I'd like to say to him in person, but my arms were full, the line was long, and my will was weak. But... next time, Grant Morrison. Next time!

I spent the rest of the time saying goodbye to the people I'd met over the last four days, followed by a mad frenzy of present-buying for everyone back home. Then I was out of there just in time to catch the ridiculously-crowded 4pm train back to LA.

As the trolley pulled away from the San Diego Convention Centre, I felt a sense of finality without regret. I knew I'd be back. I'd known for some time.

Last few costume photos...



I hope he has air-conditioning inside that thing.



Everyone and their dog has uploaded pictures of this girl. Like many, I'm not sure what to think of marketing this extreme. I hope she had fun and got paid well.



Trouble in the Birdman household.

That's all, folks. My longer thoughts on the con are coming soon.

Day Three

In case you haven't heard, this was the year that broke Comic Con.

In past years, Preview Night was a sedate affair, and Sunday was when everyone packed up and left. But no longer. Now, every day is exactly as insane as the last, which may be why I found this Saturday -- traditionally the worst day of all -- actually quite pleasant.

I got some meetings done in the morning, met the Twin Artists Extraordinaire Fabio and Gabriel, and took in the sights and sounds.

Then came the Big Pitch.

Suffice it to say, it went well. No nerves at all, really. However, once it was over I began to feel a bizarre sensation in the pit of my stomach. Turns out it was hunger, which I hadn't experienced for the last four days. I suppose my body suppressed my nerves by suppressing my appetite, but who knows. What am I, a biologist?

I had a big burger-y lunch at TGI Fridays, then back to the con floor. The celebrities were out in force today: Jennifer Love Hewitt, Robert Downey Jr., Gene Simmons, Rosario Dawson, Gerard Way... The crush to see them was ridiculous. I mostly wandered past, oblivious.

But I did finally meet Matt Fraction. In person he is not, in fact, the sort of psychocosmic word-shaman that you'd expect. He's actually a very friendly and pleasant sort of guy.

I also handed out a few CAGES flyers, and strategically placed the rest on the Freebies Table, a large area where people can browse and pick up whatever they want. Checking back later, around two-thirds were gone.

Afternoon rolled around. I was too far back in line to get into the Futurama panel, dammit, but I did manage to get into...



...Joss' panel which I blogged previously, in which he revealed that his favorite character to write, ever, was Illyria. Who'd have thunk it?

He told the crowd he wants to make smaller projects now (Ripper, for instance) instead of big movies, because it's been too long since he's entertained us. Sounds good to me. And he will make musicals at some point in his life, guaranteed.

He entered and exited the stage to a 2000 person standing ovation.



The Warren Ellis panel. Turns out it's not a writing persona -- he really is a drunk, abrasive, mad English bastard. I understand now why they scheduled his panel at 9pm, and far away from the other rooms -- if any old poor, innocent con-goer had wandered into that room, they would have needed counseling.

I may not adore his work, but the man is savagely hilarious in person, a savvy futurist, a soothsayer and a goddamn pioneer in his field. For example, he's leading the way yet again with the announcement of a brand-new, free, longform online series with Avatar.

Ah, but what about costumes?



Some costumes are simple...



Some are bizarrely obscure...



But some, well, they defy description.

I submit this as the weirdest, bravest costume from the con so far. Note that she is essentially naked. It takes udder commitment to pull off a costume like that.

God, that was terrible. I need sleep.

Tomorrow is Sunday. The end is in sight.

Live Blogging the Joss Whedon Panel

Ripper is greenlit at the BBC!

Writing new original horror film with Drew Goddard: 'Cabin in the Woods'.

Goddard to write arc of Buffy Season 8.

Oz to return in Season 8!

Writing a new comic, 'Sugar Shock', with Fabio Moon.

Writing a ballet for Summer Glau!

More Fray to come, plus a new Serenity ongoing comic, and Buffy will go to Season 9.

Day Two

Keeping this one light, because I have work to do today.

• The Warner Brothers screening filled Hall H -- you know, the one that seats 6 thousand people. Get Smart looks great. Zack Snyder had nothing to show from Watchmen, but instead sat down and politely talked the audience through his hopes and fears regarding the project. It was certainly a novel approach, and I hope it pays off for the film.

• The con floor was sheer, screaming madness, and it'll only be worse today.

• Hung out with a couple of friends who were down from LA for the day. We somehow obtained tickets to the Dark Horse Luncheon, which turned out to be an ultra-classy affair in a very nice restaurant, attended by a bunch of executive-looking people from Dreamworks, Disney, Tokyopop, etc. (oddly enough, I saw no one from Dark Horse). But hey, free food!

• The Vertigo panel was nice. Karen Berger is certainly on message, and a good salesperson, which is probably why she's been doing it for 14 years. The big news -- for me, at least, and probably no one else -- is that Josh Dysart has a new title called The Unknown Soldier.

• I met a bunch of people from the Engine forums for drinks and greasy food at Dick's Last Resort, a themed bar/restaurant where the theme seems to be that the waitresses insult you and the music makes your ears bleed. The company and conversation, however, more than made up for it.
  

Photos!



Worst crossover idea ever.



Hmm. Well played, Dark Knight.



The Get Smart panel with Steve Carell and The Rock.



Roaming pairs of Battys and Prises (and some Rachels and Zoras) advertised the new Blade Runner DVD release.



He's a long way from Hyrule...



The weird-looking SciFi Channel booth.



The Engine meet-up. Would you believe that drink Rachel is holding is called a 'Razzberry Dickfizzle'?

And here's your horrifying thought for the day: Last year, Comic Con sold out one day -- Saturday -- for the first time ever in its 30+ year history. This year, they sold out Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Right. The biggest meeting of my comics career is in 4 hours time. Wish me luck.

Day One

The first real con day is over, and I'm starting to think this is the craziest thing I've ever done.

It's a rollercoaster ride, physically, mentally and emotionally. I can barely stomach eating any food, and despite sleeping only a handful of hours, I'm pretty wired most of the time. I think my body believes I'm in the middle of a battlefield somewhere, huddling in a bunker, awaiting death at any moment. This isn't far from the truth.

Saw my first panels yesterday. Mark Verheiden (nervous but knowledgeable) shared tips and anecdotes from the Battlestar Galactica writing room. Villard Books -- publishers of Flight and Elk's Run -- did a nice presentation. Kazu Kibuishi is extremely clever and profound in real life. And it cheered me to learn that Joshua Hale Fialkov is in reality a big dorky guy -- for some reason, I had imagined him as a too-cool indie-jerk.

I had other panels pencilled in, but decided to cancel them so I could spend more time walking the con floor. I was on fire, baby. My mojo was with me yesterday, and I must have spent several hours introducing myself to over 20 pros. By the end, it felt so natural I was chatting up people in lines and on the train.

It's a one-off thing, I'm sure. But who wants to be a chatty guy all the time, anyway?

Some people I met...

• Jason Aaron and Cameron Stewart. Expressed my admiration for The Other Side and discussed Viet Nam a bit.
• Becky Cloonan and Fabio Moon. Lovely folks. Becky is blonde in real life, and for some reason this surprised me.
• Kieron Gillen and Jamie McKelvie. Jamie was very down-to-earth and seemed just as new to this whole con thing as I am. Kieron's a snappy dresser.
  
• Ivan Brandon and Mike Oeming. Got the new 24/7 volume, and confessed my love for Oeming's panel layouts in Cross Bronx.
• Jonathan Hickman. Was kind enough to read my samples and give advice right there at his booth. Tells me he only got into comics for the girls and the cocaine, but is yet to receive any of either.
• Andy McDonald, Ash Wood and Miles Gunter. Nice guys all.
• A bunch of other people at Oni, First Second and AiT.

Coolest of the bunch, however, were the guys manning the booth for a new self-published series called Age of Insects (http://ageofinsects.com/), who were running an amazing marketing campaign featuring posters, buttons, stickers, and live Madagascan Hissing Cockroaches (seriously) that would crawl up and down your arm. Met the artist, the writer and his wife -- great folks.

The only person I'm still dying to meet is Matt Fraction, and I hope to find him today.

But enough about comics. What about films? That's what Comic-Con's all about, right? Well, no. But I did attend the Paramount panel in Hall H, and I haven't seen crowds that big since the time I was in Italy and the Pope died.

Just to put things in perspective: Hall H seats 6000 people. That's not a typo, that's six thousand. The stage was so far away from me that the guests looked like tiny ants with tiny ant-microphones. Good thing there were 6 or so enormous TV screens hanging from the roof of the hall.

If you wanted to ask a question of someone on stage, you had to line up 20 minutes in advance at the question mic, where your question was screened by security. Then when the spotlight hit and the question mic went on, any ramblers or deviators were cut off with a kill-switch.

• First up was some awful-looking comedy by a SNL group. Even they weren't sure what they were doing at Comic Con.
• Neil Gaiman walked off-stage after presenting Stardust, only to walk back on to present Beowulf (which looks amazing).
• There was a special Indiana Jones 4 clip with Spielberg and the whole cast.
• Leonard Nimoy was a surprise walk-on during the Star Trek movie presentation.
• JJ Abrams must do a lot of crack.
• Judd Apatow video-presented Seth Rogen's new film, Drillbit Taylor.
• Biggest reaction of the day? Robert Downey Jr's Iron Man. The footage was great, the CG suit looks great, Downey Jr is perfect for the role, and Jon Favreau whipped the crowd into a frenzy with his presentation. Unfortunately, it seems to be about Iron Man killing brown-skinned terrorists for America, so fuck that. (However, there was a bit at the end with a flying Iron Man being chased by two fighter jets, perhaps indicating that he turns against the government. I sure hope so.)
  

Then I capped my day off in fine style at the star-studded (haha) Stardust premiere. There were at least 100 people in line outside the cinema, over an hour before the film started. 45 minutes before it started, they told everyone to go away because the theatre was full. I pulled out my Super-Special VIP ticket which I'd bought online the week before through Neil's blog, and they waved me through to the inside. I could feel the hating eyes of 100 desperate fans upon me, but I felt pretty good about it.

Inside, they gave me another ticket to get through security, who gave me another ticket to get into reserved seating, who asked for my original ticket. Then a stern man in a black uniform stood up front and told us that if we so much as checked our mobile phones during the show, the security men in nightvision goggles would have us up against the wall and shot.

The film, however, was fantastic -- in every sense of the word. It is unique. Princess Bride is the only frame of reference with which to compare it, but they're very different films. It worked on every level -- romance, action, comedy, witty dialogue. It will be either be a treasured cult classic or a big goddamn worldwide success, and I hope it's the latter.

See it. See it on opening night. In fact, if you're reading this and you know me in person, you better believe I'm going to drag you to it.

Some photos...



The line for the Paramount screening.



Inside the screening. That tiny brown bit is the stage.



Conan is apparently dyeing his hair blonde now.



The DC booth.



Stephen Notley, crazy artist extraordinaire.




Where can I get a tie like that?



These two pics are for Scotty...



Best mailbox ever?



My haul for the day. Most of this stuff was free. I only bought one of those four shirts, for example.

That's all folks. I gotta run to the Watchmen panel.

Xander Out.

Cloverfield

So JJ Abrams revealed nothing but a new poster. And it's not Godzilla.

Sweet Zombie Jesus

It just took me 25 minutes of solid walking to find the end of the line for the Paramount screening. I wish I was kidding.

Let The Mobile Blogging Commence

First panel of the day -- a writing workshop with Mark Verheiden -- and the line to get in is around the hall and down the stairs.

It's going to be a long day.

Day Zero

• Last night, I attended Preview Night for 2 hours. It felt like 2 weeks. Apparently, in previous years Preview Night has been a quiet, casual affair, with a few hundred fans wandering around and peering politely at the booths while vendors set up. This year, it was a raving, screaming, elbows-in-the-face, free-giveaways-and-fabulous prizes nuthouse. Almost every company had creators in their booths, already doing signings. And I'm no good with numbers, but I'd say there were about ten gajillion people there.

• Within the first hour, apparently, someone died.

• I hear that the line this morning was already huge at 7.30am. The doors don't open 'til 10.

• The cafe in my hotel is reputed to be one of the best in town. At breakfast this morning my waitress presented me with a choice of bagels, omelettes, eggs, mash or pastries, and did I want cheese, tomatoes or fries with that, and would I like it with toast, muffins or cereal, and should the toast be white, rye or wholemeal? "That's a lot of choices," I said. "It's the American way," she replied.

• The Paramount booth last night was playing the Cloverfield trailer on repeat, on a dozen big screens. Today, JJ Abrams will announce the title.

• Part of Neil Gaiman's Beowulf screened last night. I didn't attend, but the brand-new trailer is sexy: http://www.apple.com/trailers/paramount/beowulf. I like the new plot point re: Grendel's mother granting Beowulf immortality.

• I have a super-exclusive VIP insider ticket to the premiere of Stardust tonight. Will tell you all about it tomorrow.

• I met Josh Dysart last night. He was funny and down-to-earth, and looked to be one of the few creators actually enjoying himself. I told him I loved his Conan series so much that I'd bought his Avril Lavigne book. He laughed and said "Thanks for taking one for the team!"

• I also met Eric Shanower. He was a scholar and a gentleman, not to mention immaculately-dressed. I don't know if this is breaking news, but he's planning to extend Age of Bronze even further, going from 7 volumes to 12. Considering he began the series 9 years ago and he's only up to Volume 3, I'm pretty sure that's what they call a 'life's work'.

• I met Stephen Notley of Popcap Games and Bob the Angry Flower fame (infamy?). He was just as pleasantly unhinged as you'd hope.

• I didn't exactly meet Warren Ellis. He just signed my books and said nothing, although that might have something to do with this: http://www.mailbucket.org/lastmillionmiles1-2722530.html.

Super Bonus Photo - Here's all the crap I managed to accumulate last night in only 2 hours...



I shudder to think how much I'll have to haul away by the end.

These United States

A few observations...

Observation the First: At the risk of generalising, Americans really are as friendly as people say. They're almost aggressively polite, especially if you look like you need help with something. I just spent a two and a half hour train ride talking to a very nice girl about her web design company and her hopes for the future. Five minutes ago, a man who looked like a professional wrestler complimented me on my shoes.

Perhaps it's just Californians. Perhaps it's just me. But I'm not complaining.

Observation the Second: San Diego is a beautiful place. The streets are clean, the buildings look like Spanish Renaissance paintings, and the fire hydrants are bright yellow (how cool is that?).

It is, however, ridiculously fucking hot. My back is drenched in sweat after 10 minutes in the sun.

Observation the Third: You know what's good? A Starbucks double espresso shot poured over ice. Nothing else.

I know this because a barista made me one today by accident after mishearing my order. And my wacky antipodean accent comes in handy again.

How about photos?



We're popular now, apparently. Maybe I missed the memo.



I'm fairly certain my room was designed by and for midgets.



My first clue was this midget TV, which looks more like a palm pilot.



Union Station in L.A. is very pretty...



...as is San Diego's old district.

More soon, True Believers.

Not Dead, Only Jetlagged

Hello from sunny Santa Monica, Los Angeles.

My laptop battery is running out as fast as my wi-fi credit, which is disappearing along with my brainpower and will to live -- 20 hours on a plane will do that to you -- but here I am, regardless.

Comic Con is tomorrow. No wait, make that COMIC CON.

In 24 hours, the madness begins. I promise to post photos.

Wake Up! Time To Fly

Second post. How about that?

In less than 24 hours, I’ll be on a plane to San Diego, California to attend the world’s largest comic book convention – just me and 150,000 other geek culturephiles. We’re talking about an event so enormous that its official name is, quite simply, Comic Con.

This is actually my first visit to the Star-Spangled Empire, and I’ll admit to being a little on edge. I know it’s irrational, but I have this unshakeable fear that airport security will be able to smell my commie pinko leanings from a hundred metres away, and before you can say “extraordinary rendition” I’ll have earned myself a place of honor on the Department of Homeland Security Terror Watch List (a.k.a. the Bag Over Your Head And A One-Way Flight To Bulgaria List).

But let’s assume that doesn’t happen.

Assuming I make it to San Diego intact, I’ll be attending for a full 5 days of meetings and greetings, regrettable purchases and massive geek-outs. I have 3 (three!) projects to pitch, a lovely glossy pamphlet for CAGES to hand out to unsuspecting con-goers, and even some freshly-minted business cards. And I’ll be blogging the best of it right here, for your edification and enjoyment.

Wish me luck. And stay tuned, True Believers…